What a scoop! We’ve managed to get an interview with the Prince of Pop and general showstopper, Michael Jackson!
Mark: Hi Michael, thank you very much for giving MTB Shorts your time.
MJ: Yes. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to discuss my new favourite activity, mountain biking.
Mark: Pleasure. So how did your interest in MTB begin?
MJ: Well, I had this ranch a long, long time ago and I just loved cycling through it with all the children, just eating candyfloss and ice-cream.
(At this point, Michael sneezes into a tissue and his nose falls off.)
Mark: Err…sorry, um…your nose *points*
MJ: Oh gosh, sorry. This happens quite often. You should see the party tricks I can do with other limbs *giggles*
Mark: Alright. Back to MTB questions; what kind of bike do you like to ride?
MJ: Oh that depends on what my bodyguard, Ezekiel, wants to ride. I just sit on the front and hold on, while he peddles away.
Mark: But how the hell can you like cycling, if you don’t cycle?
MJ: I do it all for the children. Just to watch them in their little, tight shorts and little gloves. Bless their tiny souls *giggle*
(I’m seriously mortified by this creep.)
Mark: I’m done.
MJ: Don’t forget to support my new CD coming out soon *giggle*
*This interview is entirely false, because we all know that Michael Jackson is just Prince’s alter ego.