Well, well, seems like I got the interview of the year. I managed to secure an interview with a very well-known South African politician; however I was forced to change his name to ZJ because of some legal implications that it may cause *something about some Indian guy in jail and a court case about something or another*
Mark: Good day Sir, it truly is an honour to have the opportunity to interview a well-known public figure, such as yourself.
ZJ: Eh, yes…It is a pleasure to be here.
(ZJ begins to look under his chair and around the room very suspiciously.)
Mark: Is there a problem?
ZJ: I’m just looking for the hidden cameras. I don’t want to be surprised by Debra Patta. Eish, that woman has caught a few of my friends out!
Mark: No, no. This isn’t that kind of interview. It’s for a cycling blog – MTB Shorts. Alright, let’s get started with the first question. Do you enjoy mountain biking?
ZJ: Yes I do. But I categorically deny ever using it to further any political agenda.
Mark: Um okay *slightly bewildered look on my face* So where do you enjoy cycling?
ZJ: I used to love cycling through Houghton with a friend of mine, but we’re not so close anymore since I became more popular and have more friends on Facebook. You know how jealousy moves?
Mark: How jealousy is.
ZJ: That’s what I said!
Mark: No, you didn’t. You said moves.
ZJ: Eish! No, you don’t have it on paper. It’s my word against yours.
Mark: Sigh. Okay, moving along. What do you enjoy doing after you exercise? How do you wind down?
ZJ: I take a nice hot shower and wash myself good.
Mark: Holy crap! Okay, I give up. This interview is not going according to plan.
ZJ: Plan! You said plan! I knew it was all a setup! I’m innocent, I tell you. E-N-O-S-E-N-T!
PLEASE NOTE: This interview is entirely false, because we all know that South African politicians are too busy preparing for the upcoming elections by watching reruns of The West Wing.